We hear a lot of talk about how to have great sex, how to turn a woman on, the delights of non-verbal communication and so on, but it all seems to miss the point.
What I find missing is any understanding of a woman's need outside the context of sex. Please don't mistake me: I am in no way minimizing the power of good sex. It is hard to imagine how a relationship between a man and woman can flourish without it. My concern is this: sex does not stand on its own.
What makes for really good sex is in knowing the woman. There is more to making a woman hot to trot than a healthy body and “magic hands” (or wiener). If other emotional needs are not met, there will be no levitating her off the mattress.
Perhaps in the short term, when everything is new and exciting, a man gets a glimpse of the pleasure of having a woman. There is nothing wrong with new and exciting. It can be glorious, but what comes later? How does one sustain the kind of relationship that will continue to flourish? One which will insure that ecstatic non-verbal communication does not fade over time.
One cannot simply pay attention to her clitoris and expect any long-lasting fun in bed. Without an abiding commitment to the woman there will no long lasting male/female fulfillment, in or outside the bedroom.
For some men (who remain boys) any talk of commitment scares them silly and shrinks their wieners. But these boys never come to know the deep satisfaction of really knowing a woman.
In order to get down to the good stuff in a woman a man must tend to the needs of her heart. Women desire a man who will remain committed, who knows how to handle her, and cannot be led around by his nose. Once a man understands these truths about a woman's desire he will have all the non-verbal/sexual fun he can handle.