First, be aware that it was I myself who asked Random to take me in hand. He is such a kind, considerate man that from what I know of him, his previous relationships have not involved this to any great degree, because his attitude is always to do whatever it takes to make the woman he is with happy. Well I knew what I wanted, and I told him, and he listened and we talked and talked, and we found that this was not just something he could give me but something he loves as much as I do.
I'll never forget the first time he took me in hand physically. We were in a car park, and I had made an adverse comment about myself. The smile on his face changed to a look of concern and loving dominance, and he ordered me to turn around so he could spank me.
That was the moment I knew he wasn't just doing all this for me. That was the moment I realised that he gets it, that he's wired for dominance. I felt such pleasure I can't even describe it. I felt high, flying, wrapped in protective love, cared for. I felt a sense of deep gratitude, not because I have a spanking fetish (to be honest, I'm not that interested in the spanking aspect of being taken in hand) but because he cared about me putting myself down, and because he gave me the gift of his dominant love which feels so good.
Other couples have love and caring too, and express it in other ways, but this is the way I personally prefer. When Random expresses his love in non-BDSM dominant ways, it makes me feel excited, loved, protected, and submissive. I hate to admit that I love to feel submissive, because I'm not the submissive type, but I do have to admit that I love dominance because of the way it makes me feel—as though I'm floating on air, safe in his care, and well, I'm sexually wired to be excited by it.
There seems to be a big misconception that Random just likes to get his own way and not consider my desires. This is so untrue! I've never met a more considerate man. I've had a couple of very nice boyfriends but I've never met a man more caring and willing to listen than Random. Sometimes I feel moved to tears by how kind he is. This is no selfish man who feels free to walk all over me, this is a man with the kindest heart on earth, a man with the strength and love not to be diminished by pleasing those he loves.
What do I get out of it? The deepest love I've ever known, a heightened sense of pleasure and happiness in my life, a feeling of erotic excitement a lot more of the time than I'd have with a non-dominant man, and a level of intimacy that makes other relationships pale into nothing. I can tell Random my deepest secrets, fears, problems, and all the good and positive things too, and he listens and helps. He's my rock, my support, my lover, my soulmate.
Random said that this relationship makes him feel free. It makes me too feel free—free as a bird, flying, gliding on warmth, enjoying the sunshine. It's like waking up and going out into the warm sunshine and smelling clean country air after spending time in a cold dark musty building. I've never felt more loved or more free than I do with Random.
For posters to say I must be sublimating my desires and building up resentment towards him is all wrong. Nothing could be further from the truth. This is what I've always wanted! Finally, I've got what I always wanted. It doesn't get any better than this. This is my fairytale dream come true. If you think being taken in hand means the man gets what he wants and the woman gets walked on, you just don't get it. Believe me, I couldn't be happier!