Frankly, so long as you are considerate, thoughtful, and attentive to your wife's needs, there is no reason to change your attitude toward her. Regarding her as some inferior being would be rather stupid.
Still, there are some points worth considering.
First, understand that—regardless of the state of your marriage—it did not get that way overnight. This is especially true if one or both partners had been previously married or otherwise in prior intimate relationships.
Whatever habits or reactions individuals had in previous marriages or relationships, they will probably bring into subsequent relationships. This is one reason why some people run through marriages Hollywood style. The advantage to literally taking a woman in hand is that it can break the cycle.
Second, realize that it takes two people to make a marriage and only one person to break it. While one person can carry the load briefly, no one can do so indefinably.
Merely putting a difficult wife over the husband's lap is not going to make her love him. Sometimes, it will not even solve the problem! That said, unless the marriage is too far gone to save, it will cause her to respect him. In and of itself, that can be of great value.
The chances are quite good that a husband is not going to see any dramatic changes at the beginning. Not only do women test, entrenched behaviors resist change. Nevertheless, the padding of a woman's bare buttocks will frequently bring about the desired changes.
Third, again unless the relationship is dead, there are simply those times when your wife expects you to take charge. Although a woman's signals are often subtle, they may proliferate until she totally loses respect for her husband's capabilities.
At the same time, she wants to be among the most important things in her husband's life—certainly ahead of any other woman.
Fourth, Taken in Hand cannot be a pin the tail on the donkey addendum to the domestic agenda. It must be systemic.
One reason that many people find Taken in Hand so difficult to understand is that it requires rethinking and unlearning disastrous concepts designed to create unstable boyfriend-girlfriend relationships based on equality and explicit kindergarten-like “may I” permissions.
Taken in Hand is deceptively simple. It only requires understand one woman and meeting her needs—though, not always her immediate wants!
Fifth, one sure way to know that Taken in Hand is not working is for spanking to become a big deal after the first few times. In as much as possible, the disparate constituencies need to flow together as effortless as possible.
By whatever name, Taken in Hand is not some recent concoction. Instead, it developed over millennia as a practical means of problem solving before the days of professional marriage counseling, serial monogamy, and easy divorce. That is why some of its chief proponents are women!
Taken in Hand is not about beating a wife into submission. Rather, it using her natural inclinations—including the intuitive understanding that there are simply those times when a woman needs her bare buttocks soundly spanked—to separate the proverbial fire-breathing dragon from the desirable maiden.
Modern age difficulties often arise because, early in the relationship, a woman may not realize she needs to be spanked until it, with amazing predictability, dumps her emotional baggage and clears out the accumulated psychological garbage. Despite hounding choruses of naysayers, that is one reason why nonconsensual spanking—within the context of marriage—is sometimes a perquisite to domestic tranqulity.
Sixth, Taken in Hand wives do not need to be micromanaged. The longer the leash, the better the marriage once understandings are reached.
More than anything else, women need holding and emotional support. There has to be a physical and emotional connection beyond sex.
Seventh, the husband needs to be sure the he is not the problem. Male immaturity and narcissism have no place in marriage. No matter how beautiful the wife, she is not a trophy.
Good husbands cherish and nurture their wives. Insecure men treat them as perpetual servants.