To be taken in hand is to have a stronger relationship. My wife introduced the concept of a Taken In Hand relationship a while back now. It first glance I rather liked the idea of a Taken In Hand relationship and thought that it would be great. However I don’t think that I actually knew what a real Taken In Hand relationship is.
My first thought was “Okay, I’ll just tell my wife what to do and she will obey.” However anyone who knows anything about a Taken In Hand relationship knows that’s not the way things are. Sure, you are working towards this concept and idea, but it is everything in between that makes this relationship so special.
I am a rather lazy man by nature, so when my wife and I decided to try to do this in our marriage I didn’t start out very well. There were no big problems with us or anything, it is just as time went by I didn’t bother taking control, and it got harder and harder to do so the more time elapsed. Obviously this was a bad move on my part as it was originally my wife who was so into the idea of a Taken In Hand relationship. As time went on she began doing more and more things that I didn’t approve of. Just little things that she knew might annoy me. I then realized that she really did want me to take charge and be in control.
Being the man I am I find it all but too easy to drift through day to day, and this is the real reason why we were not going anywhere. My taking the path of least resistance was making my wife feel frustrated. To be a man in a Taken In Hand relationship is not just to have ultimate authority or to be able to order your wife to do something. It requires you to engage—to put all you are into your relationship, to continuously have your wife’s well being and happiness on your mind. When a decision comes your way you cannot just choose the easiest path, you have to contemplate which choice that would benefit you and your wife the most.
I know that not all Taken In Hand relationships use domestic discipline. But I just wanted to say how much this does for our relationship. My wife and I decided to start a daily spanking routine. This was just to remind us of who was the head of the household and remind her to think twice about her actions throughout the day to ensure should wouldn’t do anything annoying. This routine worked great for me and my wife. Making it an expected part of our day was a way of ensuring that I would remain present and engaged in our marriage instead of effectively checking out. However due to my lazy nature I eventually stopped this as well, and I was able to see how much of a negative effect stopping it had on our relationship. I wish I had not stopped because it made our daily lives proceed so smoothly, and I loved the loving look my wife would have on her face when it was done. Her face said I love you and I submit.
So all in all I realized how important it is for a man to actively be the man in his marriage. There is no getting lazy or slacking off when it comes to continuously building and strengthening a marriage. When you do that, your wife feels abandoned or as though you don't care about her and your marriage. For a good relationship you need to be fully present and engaging in the relationship. Women need active connection. The trick is to find ways to engage in the relationship that you both enjoy.
I’ve written this post for my wife for Valentine's Day just to show her that I will put up the extra effort to show her that I can be her loving compassionate man. And I will do what is best for the most important person in my life. I am not an expert on the whole Taken In Hand relationship thing, but I do love my wife very much, and with experience and help from this site I’m hoping to explore this much further and make my wife and me as happy as we can be.