Softly taken in hand

He is a very sensitive man, and by that, I mean that he is keenly aware and in tune of his surroundings, of human nature, and of me. From our first meetings, when I was leery and suspicious of meeting men, he was relaxed and confident, and in tune with my hesitant nature. Even kidding around, he talked respectfully and kindly to me. Always a gentleman. Carefully and slowly, he was instrumental in building an "atmosphere" that I could warm up to, and I did.

He reads body posture and expressions. One time, early on, we were sitting on a blanket outdoors, he grabbed me playfully and pulled me down, quickly noting my stiff posture and quickly reassuring me to "relax". Everything's ok.

When I say I need to talk, he will pull up a chair and focus. Listen. He wants to know what's on my mind. He will also take the lead on conversations, gently explaining to me and then telling me we will end the conversation now unless I have anything further to say.

If I tell him I feel shy about something, he may tell me to come to him. Now. And then in his way of speaking, inform me that he loves me. No matter what.

Early on, he used to say I was always safe when he was around. I used to laugh at that, feeling I could take care of myself. But as time has gone on and he has periodically said to me things like if anyone ever tried to hurt me, he would take care of them, I have come to appreciate the protective instinct he has.

He cares in many little ways, such as he will point out why my high heels are not always a sensible choice . And yes, he is right. Or one day he noticed I was nervous while driving on a road and he reached over with out saying a word and gently caressed my hand.

He is a take-charge man. And he will say so. As our relationship has evolved, he tends to instruct me at times. Expecting me to comply. Pointing out when I don't. When I told him I am a leader type, he told me to be that at work, not with him. He has picked me up over his shoulder to move me from point a to point b when I am resistant. And I do shriek over that! We are so cliche'!

And I love this man dearly!


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I couldn't help but find myse

I couldn't help but find myself smiling while reading this.
It sounds like you have a great man.

"We are so cliche'!"

I know this feeling very well myself :) We have at home:
—my husband, tall, broad shouldered, broad necked, square chinned to the extreme, courted by companies, earning more and more money, taking charge of everything, caring for me in every way;
—our sons, one blond and blue-eyed, the other brown-eyed and brown-haired, enjoying all the benefits of a father who passionately caters to his family’s needs, and a mother who focuses on them in the first place;
—finally me who may not have those ideal looks (all in all a bit heavy and not too graceful in my movements), but still characterized by my husband as "the ideal woman, half a saint and half a whore and apart from that best friend to me".....
We have developed our internal, family-language, our very own rituals, the way we have fun with each other... sometimes we both laugh at the "kitsch-family" we live in.... we love it!
Saskia Weisser


I can completely relate to your story. We are the same in many ways with our relationships. I am very happy for your completeness!!!


Softly taken in hand

Smitten, yes this is what I am looking for. A strong gentle man. I don't want to be afraid of him. The threat of physical correction might be ok but I don't really want him to actually do it. So a warning look would probably be enough for me. I don't like the idea of being hit in any form. I prefer the calmer approach. You are very lucky to find someone strong but gentle.