Alpha males and the women who love them

I've always had a thing for alpha males: even when I was a little girl, I instinctively knew when I had come in contact with one. I'm not talking about men who swagger and boast and try to act macho – as far as I'm concerned, men like that are alpha-male wannabees. A true alpha male carries himself with a quiet self-confidence. He doesn't have anything to prove: he's comfortable in his own skin. He knows who he is, and what he wants, and how to go about getting it. He has that rare quality that we call charisma or magnetism.. And his age doesn't matter: young or old, it's just a part of his make-up.

Alpha males have fascinated me for as long as I can remember. I respond to this kind of man on a visceral level. All of my senses come alive when I'm around one of them. I suddenly become more aware of myself as a woman and intensely aware of them as a man. I've never felt more feminine than I do when I'm with one of these uncommon men.

When I was a much younger woman, I once had a relationship with a man who had these qualities, and I loved him like I've never loved another man since. I'm sorry to say that the relationship didn't work out, for reasons that I won't go into here; let's just say that I believe timing played a big factor in the failure of our relationship. It's a loss that I still feel to this day though, and one that I'll probably carry to my grave.

The thing that struck me about this man, and what made me love him so much, were the many facets of his personality. He was such a contradiction in some ways. He was a fairly big man, standing 6'1" and weighing 210lbs of lean muscle with rugged good-looks, and he had a competitive nature, which goes hand in hand with being a Special Forces soldier.

He was a man's man – tough, aggressive and self-driven, and certainly a hard man at times. And yet, he was the most gentle man with women and children that I have ever known. Never once in five years did he ever raise his voice to me in anger. In fact, when he was angry, his tone would become even more quiet, and that got my attention better than any yelling ever would have. He was never rough with me, his hands were always gentle on me even when he was angry. Although he did swat my bottom occasionally if he thought I needed it; but he wasn't rough in his handling of me.

It always struck me as odd, how this man who was trained to kill men with his bare hands if necessary, was so incredibly careful and gentle with me. He once said, as he stroked my arm tenderly, “I would never hit a woman...because they are too fragile and can be hurt too easily.” My heart twisted when he told me that, but I was silently amused too, because I realized that although he would never ‘hit’ a woman, he had no compunctions whatsoever about spanking them, if he thought it was needed.

He was a very protective man, of women and children in general, and even more so if you belonged to him. He could be possessive at times, but yet he allowed me my freedom and space. He was an intense and passionate lover and could make me melt with just a look. I never felt so safe as I did when I was in his very capable, loving arms. His touch could ignite my blood and calm my soul like no other's. He was the love of my life, and I'll never forget him.

Laura

Take the Taken In Hand tour

Have you seen the following articles?
The subjection of women
Stereotypes
Power connectivity
My husband's calm control makes me feel submissive
My deep dark secret
Is this a victory?
Could this kind of relationship be for you?
What's in it for the man? Freedom!
The resistant woman
Why would anyone want to be controlled by a man?
The carrot or the stick?

2005 Jun 27 - 02:00 | add new comment | latest article | previous article | next article |

I fully understand...

Laura, reading your post was almost like looking into the mirror.

I have experienced almost exactly the same thing, and although sometimes, for various reasons, including timing, that one great love of your love doest quite work out, you never ever forget them.

The man in question for me is also over 6 ft and heavily set, was in the army in his younger days. Time, life experiences have taken their toll, as they do on all of us, but he still (for me) has an overwhelming sense of gentle powerful masculinity which exudes out of him. Although we had to go our seperate ways, I still miss him dreadfully at times.

Once you experirnce a man like that, it is very difficult not to compare them to someone else, although one must in order to get on with one's life. You just keep a part of them in your heart, and take it to your grave.

Grace :-)

by Grace on 2005 Jun 27 - 08:52 | reply to this comment

Alpha Males and the Women Who Love Them

Hi Grace,

Thanks so much for your kind response. :) Yes, life does go on...it's been many years for me, about 13 to be exact, but you're right; you never forget that one great love in your life. I wouldn't want to forget anyway...the memories are too precious and I'm just thankful to have had the chance to experience a love like that.

Laura

by Lolly7512 on 2005 Jun 27 - 23:20 | reply to this comment

Alpha Thoughts

As a man, I'm about to share something I hope will help women who are looking for an alpha male. As many here have noted, true alpha males are a rare breed indeed.

[See this comment for the rest of this. - Editor]

by Brian on 2005 Jun 28 - 01:24 | reply to this comment

you brought tears to my eyes

Your description fits the man I love in so many ways. I've just lost his love (unfortunately, it was a mutual decision we had to take) and I miss him so much.

Thank you for giving me the joy of reading your wise words.

by Jane on 2007 Nov 2 - 09:34 | reply to this comment

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.