Offering an olive branch

Last night my husband and I went out for a meal and ended up missing our last train home so decided to treat ourselves to a night at the Ritz! It was great until we decided to couple that with another bottle of wine and got into an argument. I know that after a certain amount to drink I get stroppy and say things to be provocative in a very negative way. I'm not even sure what it was that I said last night. My husband was obviously furious and also upset by whatever it was I'd said but I didn't back down and stormed off to bed. He was so angry that he decided to go find another room and it took me about seven calls to his mobile to get him to come back and listen to my apology. He listened but was cleary very angry and I could feel him withdrawing from me, I was stuck because I had completely lost any memory of whatever it was I had been going on about.

So, I laid myself across his knee and said I knew that I deserved it. He gave me the hardest spanking of my life – he had to stop because his hand was so sore. When he stopped, I again said I was sorry, he accepted my apology and said that was an end to it.

This morning at breakfast I asked him if I had done the right thing or whether he felt I should have waited for him to tell me I was going to be punished. He felt very clearly that it was the right thing for me to do, he was even perceptive enough to recognise the extreme mental blocks I had to overcome to get to the point of laying myself over his knee and accepting a spanking voluntarily, he spanked me very, very hard and although he would normally restrain me because I always struggle and want to pull away, last night he didn't and I had to to overcome a huge internal struggle in order to continue with my ‘offering.’

It worked though. But then again I think an olive branch is always one of the most successful healers.

Issie

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2004 Feb 18 - 22:05 | add new comment | latest article | previous article | next article |

Ending the awkwardness

Issie, I really connected with your story. I can think of several evenings that have gone the direction you described and ended poorly because they were not resolved as simply and as honestly as you chose to act in offering yourself. It's awful to get stuck in that crappy zone over alcohol (or non-alcohol) inspired bitchiness and hurt feelings. An olive branch is the best course of action, and I'm glad you found it within yourself to take the initiative in setting things to right.

I'm also glad your husband was receptive to your actions and gave you what you deserved. I'll be printing your story out for my wife Sam to 'discover' when she cleans my office; I *know* it will get read then. It'll be a good thing to discuss over a bottle of wine (but maybe just the one).

Thanks for sharing,
Howard Frank

by Howard Frank on 2004 Feb 20 - 01:32 | reply to this comment

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