The night that changed our marriage for ever

My husband and I have been married for 31 years. In the beginning. there was no ‘discipline’. Then after a few years, by chance, my husband put me over his knee for a joke. From there, it was initially just occasional spanking for fun, nothing serious. After about ten years of being married and developing a pattern of arguing with each other, often about the same things, I got home after my evening class one night to find that my husband was mad at me.

I had gone out after class with some of my classmates and it was late when I got home. This was a bone of contention because I would often be late getting the kids to school next morning when I did that, plus he said it was a single person's behavior, not the way a married woman should behave. We used to argue about it but he never did anything until this one night... which changed our marriage for ever. That night, he was mad. He said that what I needed was an old fashioned over the knee spanking and he did just that.

At first I was angry and resisted but the truth is, I wanted him to take me in hand. I wanted him to care enough to stop me behaving like a single woman. I wanted him to put his foot down and assert himself. When he finished spanking me that first time, I clung to him and cried my eyes out..... and then I fell asleep in his arms while he stroked my head and kissed me. Next morning, I felt a sense of peace and love I'd never felt before. I think I'd wanted him to do that for a very long time, and I was acting out more and more to get a reaction out of him. Not consciously, but looking back with hindsight I think I was pushing and testing all the time until that night.

Since that night, things have been a lot more peaceful around here. Spankings don't happen very often, but they do still happen, even now, after 31 years of marriage. And when I look at my husband, I still to this day get a rush of love for him. Don't think that when you've been together this long, the passion's gone. It's not. We're still hot for each other. If anything, we have a more passionate marriage now than we did in the first decade. I think that's down to my husband having started asserting himself and putting me over his knee when the need arises (or sometimes just for fun). It makes me feel safe and protected and loved so very much. Why doesn't everybody do it?

Karen

Update: This article has attracted some flak. You might like to read the response here.

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2003 Oct 5 - 07:54 | add new comment | latest article | previous article | next article |

Misunderstood

Does the person who wrote the comment above think we're "S&M kooks"? We're not! And quite a lot of DD people are feminists too. I for one am not a kook of any kind or into S&M, I'm just a woman who enjoys being aware of my femininity and my man's masculinity. Why does everybody want to be sexless and boring? What's the harm in a little spanking if we like it? It's not like Karen was telling husbands everywhere to go home and beat up their wives!

by Jenny on 2003 Oct 9 - 22:02 | reply to this comment

Nice article, Karen

Karen --

I loved your article. The love you have between you is obvious. Most women, if they're honest, would envy you, reading your article.

by Helen on 2003 Oct 15 - 18:02 | reply to this comment

Karen, Thanks

You helped our marriage for the better: after reading your article I took charge of our home and gave my wife her first spanking ever. We have become a lot closer since and she has asked for follow-up spankings when she nags me. LOL.

John

by a Taken In Hand reader on 2004 Jan 7 - 03:31 | reply to this comment

Never posted before

Hi,

I've been lurking for about two weeks now ever since I found this site and I'm so glad I did! It is such a relief to find so many like minded people. Last night my H took me in hand for the first time and I wrote about it. Should i submit it or hold on to it until I am a little more well known? Thanks for any and all advice.

Carrie

by Carrie on 2004 Jul 1 - 17:18 | reply to this comment

Go ahead

Write it, why not? Everyone on this site will enjoy reading it, most of us can't get enough of that sort of thing! You've got to start somewhere, don't bother about not being well known, you soon will be!

by Louise C on 2004 Jul 1 - 19:57 | reply to this comment

Husbands and wives

I too am in a mariage where my husband is the master of the house, and I love it. we dated for 3 years before me married. It was hard for us at first because he is from Africa and is Muslim and I am white and Christian. he has never tried to change that or tried to get me to cover myself as many of our freinds are. There are no children so we did not have to hide anything at home. But when I act up (smile) I do get in trouble.

This was the life I chose with my husband/master of our home. We are both in our forties now having been married for 10 years. I would not trade this life for anything. I know in his country it is nothing for husbands to control their wives. When we went to his home I seen many wives being spanked any any given time. But we do keep ours private. His father ask him if he was the keeper of his home and of course my husband said yes. But he has never been harse with me. He would never use anything like a cane or anything that would really hurt me. My husband loves me as I do him. I think if more men and women would be in this life there would be fewer divorces.

by a Taken In Hand reader on 2004 Jul 9 - 04:23 | reply to this comment

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