How Taken In Hand makes the mundane erotic

Some readers question whether Taken In Hand can make the mundane erotic. Undoubtedly it can.

What makes anything erotic is the dynamic surrounding it. For Taken In Hand people the power dynamic is what causes the erotic feelings/tensions. That tension and subsequent release is what causes the pleasure. Fear, pain and pleasure are on the same neural circuits. For some, increasing pain also increases pleasure.

Fear works the same way. Threat of punishment induces fear. If there are loving pleasurable thoughts present, then they increase in the presence of fear. This is part of the Taken In Hand dynamic.

Another part of the Taken In Hand dynamic that speaks to the mundane is that there is order. When things are ordered they are comfortable. Using fear to create order increases pleasure and comfort.


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I personally find that threat of punishment, rather than causing fear, has a calming effect on me, so that if I am in a stroppy mood or something, the threat (or rather prospect) of a good thrashing makes me feel quite calm and cheerful again.


I so agree with the statement

I so agree with the statement "For Taken In Hand people the power dynamic is what causes the erotic feelings/tensions." That is definitely the way it is in my home. My husband rarely spanks me, as he uses spankings as a last resort or for something I have done that could be potentially dangerous or if I deliberately don't do as he says. And I don't care for the erotic spankings I hear about here.

That being said, it is the power that S has over me that causes our relationship to be so sexually charged.

One of the things that I love about S is his strong touch. In our love life he sometimes overpowers me to get what he wants and it is the hottest feeling ever. So rather than spanking me to show his power, he finds ways to take me in hand in other ways—such as a firm tone, a tight hold on me, a tug on my hair, etc. And when he does those things when we are in public, I love it even more—as he is discreet and usually only I notice his change in demeanor when he is annoyed. It is his way of saying "Im in charge and if you forget it, there is a punishment spanking coming."

Those things happen quite often, as I not the best behaved wife. And with each of those things (he calls them attitude adjustments), my desire increases for him tremendously. The power is what is erotic to me. And he finds ways to show me that power often.