Something very positive happened this past weekend. I've been holding off on writing about it until the discussions about consent ran their course. Well, that seems to have happened, so here is an update.
On Sunday, Elle said something out of the blue. It is actually typical of her communication style. I had come up behind her in the kitchen and wrapped my arms around her to give her a hug.
She purred and continued what she was doing. Then, after a moment, she said, “What you did last Thursday...” (She was referring to the events I discussed in this post).
“Mm?” I replied.
“You can do that anytime you want. I really liked it—not as it was happening obviously—but... it was nice.” She turned around and held me tight.
Eventually, she whispered, “It's so much better. I can just be me. I can be a &*^%# if I feel like it, get spanked for it and not have to feel bad because you aren't mad at me.”
There was another long pause as she gave me a back-rub from the front with the palms of her hands. “Just make me feel like that every once in a while,” she said. “The past week and a half have been wonderful.”
I think it was the first time she's said something about being taken in hand without saying that it wasn't enough.
When we let go of the hug and she turned back to chopping whatever it was, she said, “Make me do something tonight. I want to feel it.”
No, the words I've quoted above aren't the real words that she spoke, but what she actually said wouldn't have made sense to anyone other than me. Besides that, it was too personal to share in its literal form.
So, the whole point about consent (implicit/explicit or whatever) has become moot for us. I had to get us to where we are without the benefit of consent, but now that we're here, she's actually made it explicit.
This whole thing reminds me of Captain Kirk violating the prime directive—and then after he's saved the Federation, getting a message from Starfleet that he's authorized to violate the prime directive if necessary.
If he'd failed... well, the whole point is that he had to succeed.
Yes, I could have used a more highbrow metaphor, but Elle and I have been Star Trek fans together for twenty-eight years and it seems fitting.