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An etiquette in the relationship

My partner, Catherine, who is 35, and I have been together six years. I am 49. We live in the UK. I have visited your site a few times since discovering it in the summer, and have read many of the articles, and it is worth saying what a relief it is to hear intelligent voices discussing a subject that is fraught with misunderstanding. I thought I would take the opportunity to share my own thoughts and our experiences with you all.

I think a Taken In Hand relationship is about expressing sexuality, not in an old-fashioned way, but in an honest way. It is not about bullying, but about willing surrender leading to a wonderful release of tension which allows us to be in love. It is not about repression, but about an etiquette in the relationship, about making agreements that help us to live in harmony, where there are no hidden gripes or judgements.

Because a sexual relationship is physically intimate, part of the etiquette is to use physical means to express it. There is something about a man taking a woman in hand, using his natural domination wisely and intelligently, and for the woman to find security and safety in feeling his male strength hold her, and for action to be taken in whatever way has been agreed between them. There is something about this that enables the woman to express her female strength with more certainty in the relationship.

John wildromantic

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Mon, 20/12/2004 - 21:41

Comments

#1 Strength

This is an older post, yet I ran across it and really agree with the point about a woman feeling the man's strength. It is very reassuring to express one's own strength, and to know that your man can handle it. That it doesn't scare him.

Smitten

Submitted by a Taken In Hand reader (not verified) on Fri, 30/05/2008 - 05:09.

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